Sharing Some Feedback on my Coaching
Can I share some bits of feedback I’ve received over the last few months?
I’ll tell you right now – it made me feel good. 👇
The first came from a client who said “I just wanted to let you know, my wife says that whatever we are doing is making a difference, and she wants me make sure we keep talking.”
A different client offered the second piece. In our first coaching session she mentioned how her financial advisor always starts their meetings with the question “how has your money brought you joy recently?” Her answer last week – “I’ve decided to hire a coach who can help me as I think about my future.”
A client’s wife – who I’ve never met – says “this is making a difference – keep it up” and another client – who I’ve only just started talking to – says the decision to work with a coach has brought her joy. . . . how wonderful to hear, right?
My thoughts on these comments and the pleasure I felt inspired me to delve deeper into the value of feedback of this type.
This feedback takes the form of recognition. It doesn’t rank or compare (“you’re the best/worst”), nor does it promote development (“this would be better if you ….”). It simply recognizes. It says “I notice this” or “I value this” or “I appreciate you” with no intent to evaluate or change, just as it is.
I’ll admit, it’s taken me some time to see the value in this type of feedback. In my mind recognition feedback has always seemed subordinate to evaluative or developmental feedback. Sometimes it can sound like the dreaded “participation trophy” or as something you say instead of giving tough feedback of the other kinds, like a feedback evasive maneuver. Maybe I used to worry that recognition feedback would “encourage” complacency or poor performance.
❓ Why not consider the many benefits of giving and receiving recognition feedback:
1. It’s positive in nature
2. It shows that you see and value the person, not just the person’s output
3. There’s no limit on how much you can give
4. It promotes empathy and builds connection
5. It’s generous, and generative
6. It creates engagement and therefore supports development and performance
If this type of feedback doesn’t already come naturally, I suggest you practice.
Pick someone you will interact with today and challenge yourself to find what you appreciate, recognize, and feel gratitude. Then tell them in direct, simple, terms without the need for a response.
Start to make a habit of it.
It won’t be long until you’ll notice a difference in how you relate to others and how they react to you.
To discuss how to create a sustainable culture of feedback or other leadership topics, connect with me here or at john@aconnectedcoach.com